What do you think?! Here's what's on my plate: meeting new people, making friends, i.e. the usual college woes; but then there are the music major's worries: will I be good enough for a school of this reputation? Will my teacher be patient enough to deal with my blunders and slow pace? Yes, there's maybe a little exaggeration here, but jeeze, there is a lot to worry about. "Oh you'll be fine, you were good enough to get accepted, etc" sounds nice, but doesn't truly reassure.
One of my relatives had a serious talk with me about my confidence levels and how I shouldn't be hard on myself. I know she's right. It's hard to convince myself. I shouldn't be afraid of failure; it's a vital part of learning. This sort of introspection is a battle between what sounds right to me and what is honest. I'll have to work on merging the two sides...
On the other hand, I am totally thrilled to go to college. Most people cite it as some of the best years of their lives, and I am ready for a change from the routine. I will miss so many people. I'm trying not be a goddamn wuss choking up, but of course my parents and close friends and family will always be tugging at my heart. My parents will be empty-nesters, and I'll be worried that they won't take care of themselves (in reality, i'm sure they'll be living it up!). I hope my closest friends and I don't grow apart! I hope I don't become too much of a socially inadequate music nerd!!
And I don't want to worry about my freaking laundry! I'm too spoiled for this. Pathetic!
You're on the brink of some very exciting times -- and probably ready not to just anticipate your future anymore, but to get on with it.
ReplyDeleteAnd this campus looks quite lovely. I can't wait to visit it, if only briefly.